Persocom of the Future
by dontcryMasha
Summary: Prof. Farnsworth has a mysterious old robot that must be delivered to a team of archeologists. But when Bender's curiosity gets the best of him, the old robot's fate is changed. T for language.
1. Chapter 1

Leela, Fry and Bender were just returning from a very boring delivery to the boring planet of Snoozella. They docked the ship and got out.

"Jeez!" Bender yelled. "What a boring trip."

"I didn't know you could actually be bored to death!" Fry exclaimed. "Huh, Leela, huh? Huh?"

Leela rolled her eyes. "Yes, you can."

"Yeah I know! You saw all those guys that had died! Crazy, right? Huh, huh?"

"Fry, stop. I don't know what you're getting at, but it's incredibly annoying."

"Awww…"

"Good news, everyone!" Professor Farnsworth popped out of nowhere with a smile on his face. "I have a very unuuuusual package for you to deliver tomorrow morning."

"Oh, boy. Here we go again," Bender said, rolling his eyes. "Unusual my ass. I bet it's just some toilet seat or something."

"Don't listen to him, Professor," Leela butted in. "What is it?"

"It's an ancient robot that they dug up just outside of Tokyo!"

"WOAH WAIT?" Bender suddenly yelled. "A robot? It's a robot? Oohh yeah. Is it a dude or a chick?"

"Now, now, Bender," the professor said. "Cool your battery. As I said, it is an _ancient _robot. I don't believe it is in working order. Either way, I haven't actually seen the thing. It was shipped to me as a mid-point. Its next destination is DurtenSkroll, the planet of German archeologists."

"Blaaaaaaaah. We should at least get to see it first," Bender complained.

"Yeah, Bender's right!" Fry chimed in. "When's the next chance we'll get to see an ancient robot?"

"Fry, no…" Leela said quietly.

"No why? Come on, Leela. Don't be a buzz kill," said Fry. Leela palmed her face in disappointment. "Let's see the robot, Professor!" Fry cheered.

"Yeah! It could be like, my ancestor!" Bender yelled.

"Well," Professor Farnsworth said, thinking. "I suppose it couldn't hurt to just take a quick look at it. Then perhaps we can better describe it to the researchers at DurtenSkroll."

"WOO-HOO!" Bender and Fry yelled, high-fiving each other. "Let's see the robot!" Bender cheered. They all followed the professor down to the loading bay. There was a big crate marked **_ROBOT_****.**

"Is this it?" Fry asked. Bender smacked him. "DUH!" He said.

"If we just…lift…here…" said the professor. He toggled a crowbar into the boards and struggled to pull them apart. Leela offered assistance, and she quickly got one side of the crate open. It was filled with packing peanuts.

"Peanuts?" Bender yelled. "PEANUTS? The robot is a bunch of PEANUTS?"

"Did somebody say peanuts?" Zoidberg called out, crawling from somewhere. He sniffed across the floor until he found a packing peanut. Sucking it into his mouth, he chewed and chewed. "This is no peanut I ever heard of, but what the hey! A peanut is a peanut, am I right?"

"Those aren't the robot, everyone," Professor Farnsworth clarified. He stepped in to the crate and pulled out what looked like a human.

"Woah!" Bender called out.

"Cool!" Fry exclaimed.

"Looks advanced. How old did you say it is?" Leela asked. The professor laid the robot onto the floor and gave it a once over.

"Ah, yes," he said. "I know _exactly _what it is. I should I say, _she_!"

Bender ran up to the robot and stared at her. "Oh my Jesus lord pickle," he said. "She is the most beautiful, sexy robot I have ever seen."

She looked like a girl. Though old and beat up from time, her face was still fair and pretty. She had long, blonde hair and two strange ears. She was wearing a brown dress.

"This is a Persocom," Professor Farnsworth said. "They were popular in the early 2000s. Scientists learned how to put Smart Phone technology into a humanaid android. Quite popular, if I say so myself."

"Early 2000s?" Fry asked. "So they were probably developing this while I was around?"

"Yes indeed," the professor said. "Unfortunately, almost all of them were destroyed during the Japanese Technology Rebellion of 2053. This is quite astounding to find one, and in such great condition!"

"Yeah how do you turn her on?" Bender said, followed by an obnoxious chuckle.

"Don't touch her, Bender!" Leela shouted. "Don't even do anything! I doubt she works anyway. This is a piece of history!"

"Okay, okay, fine. Sheesh." Bender complained.

"Let's just put her back in the box and take her to her new home," Leela said.

"Excellent idea," Farnsworth agreed. They sat the persocom up and put her away. They nailed the crate shut, and Bender sulked away. "Not fair," he said to himself. "The most beautiful robot is just inches away from me, and I can't even touch her."

"Now, the researchers want to get the robot early in the morning," Farnsworth told his crew. "So I want you all to get a good night's rest and be back here at dawn."

"Sure thing, Professor!" Fry yelled.

"Sure thing, Professor," Bender imitated to himself.

"Let's go, Bender."

"Naaah, I got uhh…couple things I gotta catch up on! You know, booze and babes and stuff."

"Oh. Uh. Alright. I'll see you later, dude." Fry waved and left the building.

Bender crept along the floor and hid underneath a cabinet. "Now I just wait here until everyone is gone…" he whispered to himself. "Dooo, doo doo doo."

Once the coast was clear, he slid back out onto the floor and slowly stood up. Being as quiet as possible, he tiptoed down to the loading bay once more. He stood in front of the box marked **_ROBOT_****.**

"Oohh yeah," Bender said to himself softly. "Come to papa." He extended his arms and pulled off the front board of the crate. Some of the packing peanuts fell out. He stepped across them and sat down beside the persocom. Her face was like a porcelain doll. "Hey, sexy ladaay," Bender said to her. But she didn't move. Her eyes were shut. Her body was inanimate. Where was the on switch? She _must _have one. Bender groped around her body. Wow! It was really soft. She even felt like a human. He put his hands between her legs, naturally, when suddenly…

Her eyes shot open! The computer immediately booted it and began to move. Bender jumped. Two big bronze eyes stared at him. They focused. She raised her hands, put them on his face then FLIPPED OUT.

"Hideki! Hideki!" The persocom called out in distress. "Hideki! Hideki!"

"Shhh! SHHH!" Bender yelled. "SHHH!"

"HIDEKI! HIDEKI!" She was loud. She was really loud. She easily got to her feet and ran out of the box. "HIDEKI! HIDEKI!" She shouted. The sound filled the entire warehouse.

"BEEENNNDDEEERRR!" A different voice yelled.

"Uh oh." The robot said to himself. He hid inside the crate, but it was pretty obvious where he was. Leela shook the whole thing and yelled, "What did you do, Bender?"

"UH. NOTHING!"

"Why is the persocom on? Why is she running around?"

"Hideki? Hideki?" The female robot ran up to Leela and looked her over. She put her hands up on the mutant, but soon realized that she wasn't who she was looking for. "Hideki! Hideki!"

"Bender! What did you do?"

"I just turned her on! GOD! SORRY!" Bender huffed and puffed. Leela dragged him out of the crate.

"She's freaking out," Leela said. "How do we calm her down?"

Professor Farnsworth came into the room. He watched the robot as she ran away. "Amazing!" He yelled. "She's fully operational!"

"Professor," Leela said sternly. "Bender turned her on. He snuck into her crate and…"

"It's incredible!" Farnsworth went on. "How could such an inferior robot last for so long?"

"Professor…?"

"Come here, robot!" The professor called out to the persocom. She was still running around in a panic. "Hideki! Hideki!" She yelled.

"Hideki is here, robot!" The professor lied.

"Hideki?" She stopped moving and turned to face Farnsworth. "Hideki is…here?"

"Yes, yes. Now come here, robot."

"Chiiiii…" she cooed and ran to the professor. "Where is…Hideki…?"

"What is your name, robot?"

"Chii is Chii."

"Chii? Is that your name?"

"Chiiii…"

"My name's Bender," Bender interrupted. He popped out in front of Chii.

"Ben…der? This is Bender." Chii pointed at the metallic robot. "Bender is…a trashcan."

"WHAT! Hey! What the hell?" Bender yelled. "I ain't no trashcan, sister! I'm a robot and you're a robot!"

"Ro…bot?" Chii asked.

"Chii," Professor Farnsworth interrupted. "Are you a persocom?"

"Chii…is a Chobit."

"What's that?" Leela asked. "Professor, what's a Chobit?"

"I haven't the faintest idea! Chii, what is a Chobit?"

"A Chobit…is Chii! Chii is a Chobit. Hideki said Chii is a Chobit."

"Who is Hideki?" Farnsworth asked.

"Who? Hideki is here…"

"I'm sorry, Chii. Hideki isn't here. I don't think Hideki is alive."

"Hideki…Hideki?" Chii suddenly became frantic again.

"No, no!" The professor said. "Stop! Chii, you must stop."

"Chii stops…"

"Where did you last see Hideki?"

"Hideki…Hideki was…Chii does not remember."

"Who is Hideki? Is Hideki a Chobit?" Farnsworth asked.

"No. Hideki is not a Chobit. Hideki is Chii's owner."

"Ooohh," The professor hummed. Leela made a sad face. "Awww, she's looking for her owner. How sweet. Poor Chii."

"Chiiii…" the persocom sighed.

"It's okay, Chii," Leela coaxed. She put her arms around the robot, who hugged her weakly in return. "You've been sleeping for a long time."

"Chii was…"

"Hmm?" Leela asked.

"Where was Chii?"

"I don't know," Leela said. "But you're here now."

"Hey, come on!" Bender interrupted. He tapped his foot. "I think seeing as I'm the only other robot here, I should take care of Chii."

"Bender, Chii is going to DurtenSkrool tomorrow. Nobody's taking care of her," Leela said sternly.

"Chii misses," said the persocom. She looked very sad. "Chii is lonely."

"Well, you'll have a new home tomorrow," Leela said.

"Hmmmm!" Farnsworth exclaimed. "I think this discovery will change the outcome of her future!"

"What do you mean?" Leela asked.

"I believe the archeologists were unaware of the robot's ability to function. I'll go tell them. It could possibly change where they want her to go." Farnsworth left the room, mumbling to himself. Chii looked at Bender.

"Bender is…" she said quietly.

"I'm not a trashcan," he grumbled.

"Bender is a robot."

"Yeah! I am! All robot, all the time, baby!"

"Chii…"

"What's wrong, Chii?" Leela asked. Chii looked up at her.

"Chii is sad," she said. "Chii is lonely. Chii wants to see Hideki."

"I'm sorry, Chii," Leela said. "But we'll find you a new owner."

"New owner?" Chii asked. She suddenly looked _very _upset.

"Ummmm, well, we'll find you a new friend!"

"Chii!" The robot smiled and bounced up and down. Bender ran up in front of her. "One your own kind!" He said. "How about a Bender? Huh? Wouldn't you like to be friends with a Bender?"

"Bender!" Chii yelled. "Chii would like a friend with Bender."


	2. Chapter 2

"Yeah, and Bender wants a friend with Chii, or, whatever," said Bender. "A very sexy friend."

"Chiii?" The persocom stared at him strangely.

"Bender," Leela said. "I don't think she's a sex robot."

"Well yeah, I uh, knew that!" Bender said quickly. Chii kept staring at him. "Sex robot? What is sex robot?"

"Oh, Chii, don't listen to Bender," said Leela. "He's a _very _bad influence."

"Bad influence," Chii repeated. She pointed at Bender and repeated, "Bad influence! Bad influence! This is a bad influence!"

"Ugghh, great, Leela, thanks," Bender grumbled. "Chii, let's go someplace more private." He walked away from Leela and signaled for Chii to follow. She did.

"Bender, wait!" Leela yelled. "Don't do anything until the Professor comes back!"

They of course ignored the mutant and left before the Professor came back. Bender took her outside. Chii looked around the city in amazement. "Where is this?" she asked.

"It's New New York City. I guess you've never heard of it."

"Chii does not know this place," said the persocom. "Chii knows Tokyo."

"That's so crazy," Bender said. "But I think the Tokyo that you know is way long gone now."

"Long gone?" Chii asked. Bender nodded and signaled for her to keep following. They walked down the sidewalk and away from the Planet Express warehouse. "Chii is scared."

"Why's that?"

"Chii does not know this place. Chii does not recognize."

"Oh, you'll get used to it. Here, look." Bender started to point out everything around them. "That's a suicide booth. You go there if you want to die. You probably shouldn't do that, 'cause we don't want you to die or nothin'. Those are people. Those are more people. You know what people are, right?"

"Chii knows people!" the persocom announced happily. Her eyes closed cutely and she bounced up and down on her heels with her hands together. "Chii likes people!"

"That's great. And those over there, see those? More robots."

"More robots?" Chii followed Bender's hand to where a group of regular robots were hanging out. "Are they like Chii?"

"Yeah, just like Chii," Bender said. "The city's crawling with robots. We practically run this place. You wanna go to a robot bar?"

"Chii does not know. What is robot bar?" They kept walking.

"It's where robots go to get boozed up 'n stuff."

"What is boozed up?"

"Sheesh. You don't know a whole lot about anything, do you?" Bender asked aggressively. "Boozing it up is when you drink. What do you like to drink? Beer? Vodka? Rum?"

The persocom looked at Bender as if he was speaking a completely different language. She tilted her head and said, "Chii does not drink." Bender pretty much lost it here. "WHAT? You don't drink? What kind a lousy robot are you, anyway?"

"Chii does not know."

"Holy moly," Bender grumbled. "I don't think you're really worth the trouble, sister!"

"Chii does not understand." Standing in the middle of the sidewalk, being passed by tons of people and robots alike, Chii froze with a perplexed look on her face. "Is Bender…angry?"

"Bender doesn't think he can have fun with Chii after all!" Bender yelled obnoxiously. "I think I'm just gonna go by myself. You can hang out with _Leela _or whatever."

"Chiiii…." The persocom sighed sadly to herself as Bender stormed off down the sidewalk. She looked from side to side, trying to get an idea of where the Planet Express was, but of course, her GPS was way out of date. Just before she got overwhelmingly disoriented, a voice she had heard earlier called out. "Hey, Chii!" The robot perked up and honed in on where the sound came from. It was that human boy with the red jacket. Fry waved to her through the slew of people. "Come over here!"

"Chii comes!" She ran through the foot traffic and caught up to Fry. "Bender is mad, because Chii does not drink!" she announced, sounding almost happy.

"Aww, don't worry about Bender, Chii," Fry said sympathetically. "He's the life of the party. If you don't fit in with him, it's not a big deal."

"Life of the party?"

"Ahh forget I said anything," Fry said. He took Chii's arm and guided her back to the building she came from. "So, I'm guessing we probably have a lot in common."

"What do you guess?" Chii asked innocently.

"Well, y'see Chii, you went to sleep around the same time I did, probably. I'm also from one thousand years ago."

"One thousand years? Chii is from one thousand years?" She looked sad again.

"Yeah. I dunno what happened. But it's really exciting to meet someone that's also from back then!"

"Chii…" the robot held onto Fry's arm and continued to look sad as they walked back to the Planet Express. The city was full of noise, but Chii was silent. Fry felt bad, but at least he could properly empathize. When they got back to the building, Leela was waiting out front. "Oh, Fry," she said, sounding annoyed but obviously not at him (for once). "I was expecting Bender to bring her back here."

"No, apparently Bender isn't so crazy about her anymore."

"Why's that?"

"Chii does not drink," Chii said finally. "Bender did not like that. Bender is life of the party, and Chii is not worth the trouble."

"Oh, just forget about him!" Leela said. "_Bender _isn't worth the trouble. I'm sure you're a very wonderful robot to be friends with."

Chii looked up at Leela and smiled, making a tiny "Chii!" sound. Leela smiled back and continued, "The professor got in touch with the archeologists, and he wanted to talk to us all. So how about we just come back inside and figure this out."

"Sure thing, Leela," said Fry. The three of them walked inside and took their usual, and not so usual, seats around the giant circular table. The professor was already there. "As Leela probably told you, I've just spoken with the archeologists at Durtenskrool."

"Yes," Chii said softly.

"They have decided it would be best if _they _came to us and checked Chii out here. They're a bit worried about her ability to function for long periods of time, and would rather not put her back into space until they can confirm any stability."

"That makes sense," said Leela. "So we'll just keep her safe and sound here."

"Oh wow, that's awesome!" Fry said. "Hey, Chii, can we talk about stuff from the 90s?"

"What is 90s?"

"The 1990s…"

"Chii was built in the year two thousand and one. Chii does not know the 90s."

"But that's ALMOST the 90s! You've gotta know stuff from that time. And stuff!"

"Chii does not know…"

"We'll figure it out. Professor, can I take Chii home with me so we can figure out what stuff from the 90s she knows?"

"I'm afraid not, Fry," Farnsworth said. "I'd rather keep her here so we can better monitor her. And I'd prefer if she doesn't leave the building anymore."

"Aww, that's no fun," Fry said, bummed out. "But we can still hang out here! And we can talk about stuff here!"

"Wow, how did you ever come up with that, Fry?" Leela said sarcastically.

"Now, now, Leela," Farnsworth butted in. "Don't sour up Fry's enthusiasm just because _you _can't make new friends."

"Excuse me?!" Leela yelled. "Are you actually insulting my social skills?"

"To be perfectly honest, I don't exactly see you hanging out with friends all of the time," the professor said with a wrinkled smirk.

"Oh, don't even get me started! I can _too _make friends!"

"Leela! You're friends with meeee!" Fry whispered. "Tell him you're friends with meeee!"

"Fry, I can hear you," the professor said. "And I don't think Leela is actually your friend."

"He is my friend, professor," Leela said. She looked at Fry and narrowed her eye at him. "Just not a very good one."

"Chiiii?" the persocom suddenly asked. Her face pricked up and she looked back and forth from Fry to Leela. "What is the problem?"

"Nothin'," Fry grumbled. "Come on, Chii, let's find something to do inside the building, okay?"

"Just be careful with her, Fry," Leela warned.

"Yeah, yeah," he said. Chii got up from the table and followed Fry into another room. Once they were out of earshot, she walked up close to him and asked, "What is the problem?" once more.

"Chii, you wouldn't understand."

"How does…Fry…this is Fry, right?" she pointed at the young man.

"Yeah, I'm Fry."

"How does Fry know that Chii does not understand?"

" 'Cause you're just a robot. An _old_ robot. And old robots don't get love. Most people don't even get love."

"Love? Chiii…" the robot suddenly got a faraway look in her eyes. They focused oddly. Fry noticed this and asked, "What's up, Chii?"

"Chii understands."

"Huh?"

"Chii loves Hideki," she said sadly. "But Chii is a Chobit. And Chobits cannot love. But…Chii loves Hideki! But Hideki is not here."

"Aww, Chii, you know what? I think we have a lot in common."


End file.
